How to Make an Omelet

Today, I thought I'd make an omelet.....but I wanted to fancy it up, so I looked around for some recipes. While I should have followed the first recipe, I wound up passing out in my kitchen corner in a hazy fog, plumes of smoke billowing from my stove top.....read on.

Simple

How to Make an Omelet
From the South Beach Diet folks

Omelets are just as easy to make, and they allow you to introduce variety while impressing your family and friends. Simply follow these easy steps for making a perfect omelet.

1. Start by cracking 2 or 3 eggs into a bowl.

2. Beat the eggs with a wire whisk or fork until the whites and yolk are combined but not foamy. You can add a couple of tablespoons of nonfat milk or water to make the eggs fluffier.

3. Add a little salt and pepper to season.

4. Heat an 8- to 10-inch nonstick skillet over medium heat. The smaller the skillet, the easier it will be to manage your omelet. If you're using more than 2 to 3 eggs, use a bigger skillet.

5. Coat the pan with a little olive or canola oil and allow it to come to temperature. You'll know when it's ready to go when a drop of water sizzles in the skillet.

6. Once the oil is hot, pour in the eggs and make sure they're evenly distributed by gently shaking the pan back and forth.

7. The eggs will begin to set after 20 or 30 seconds. Once the edges are set, gently push them toward the center and allow the uncooked liquid to flow into the exposed skillet.

8. Now it's time to start adding your filling. Take whatever you've chosen as your filling and place it on one-half of the omelet. Don't add too much, or else you may have a hard time folding it.

9. Once the eggs are more or less cooked, use a spatula to fold the empty half of the omelet on top of the full half.

10. Slide the finished omelet out of the skillet and onto your plate, and garnish with a sprig of parsley or some shredded, low-fat cheese.

Simpleton

Omelet 101
from Martha Stewart

Bless her heart, but she just has to make everything so god-damn difficult. I've added my commentary [in red] to these atom-splitting instructions.

1. Heat the clarified butter [What the hell is that?] in a skillet over a medium-high flame. Whisk the eggs, salt, and freshly ground pepper together very well while the pan is heating, not before. If they have to sit and wait for the pan, the whisked eggs will deflate. You want to incorporate lots of air into the mixture so that your omelet is light and fluffy. [Deflation - bad, bad!!!!]

2. Place your hand immediately above the skillet. When your palm feels warm, the skillet is ready to start cooking. Working fast, pour the whisked eggs into the hot skillet. Reduce heat to medium. Simultaneously, whisk the eggs and shake the skillet vigorously back and forth over heat for less than a minute. You want to keep the eggs moving, incorporating some of the runny parts with the more-cooked parts until there are some curds swimming in the eggs. Stop whisking. [I'm sorry - but I needed to take a Xanax to deal with this overly anxious piece of instruction: hand near heat, simultaneously (always an anxiety producing word), fast and vigorous....now stop!!!!!!!!]

3. Continue cooking, being sure eggs cover the entire surface of the skillet, using a rubber spatula to push together any holes that may have formed. [ahhhh...Xanax working...this I can do]

4. Run the rubber spatula along the right side of the omelet to loosen eggs from the skillet. Place the spatula under the right side of the eggs, making sure that the spatula is well underneath the eggs to offer maximum support, and lift the right side over the left in one fluid motion. The folded omelet should look like a half-moon. [Wait! Are we supposed to put something in it, first?]

5. Lightly press down on the omelet with the spatula to seal the omelet together. Do not press hard; you do not want to flatten the curds. Check to make sure the handle of the skillet is still facing directly out toward you. [Flat curds - bad! But all this body positioning.....need another Xanax?]

6. Lift up the skillet with one hand, and hold the plate with your other hand. Tilt the skillet, and let the curved edge of the omelet slide onto the plate. Quickly invert the skillet, folding the portion of the omelet that is left in the skillet over the curved edge already on the plate. Keeping the skillet about stomach level with the handle facing directly out should help you do this. Garnish with a parsley sprig. [Once again, I feel like I need to be a karate master to handle all coordinated efforts!]

Once the Xanax haze clears, I'm going to Uncle Bill's.